Now I know why their interest rate is so high!

American Express - one of the first credit cards I got when I arrived in the US. It was essential for me to get a credit card in order to start building my credit history. The AmEx Green card was easy to get because I was working and while it claims to have no spending limit, it was also required that you clear the balance at the end of each monthly billing cycle. Therefore their exposure was only for one month, and as I discovered, until you build up a history with them, they don't honor that 'no credit limit'.

I got my card just before I moved to California from Texas. I was going to be reimbursed for the cost of my relocation once I started work and submitted my claim, but meanwhile my new AmEx Green card took the hit. Sadly, the 4th day of my first week at work my mother passed away, I booked a flight to Dublin due to leave SFO two hours later, and headed to the airport. At the ticket desk I presented my AmEx card only to have it refused based on the amount charged in the first month of the card's life. I spoke with the AmEx agent on the ticket desk's phone and eventually was approved (full story is in my book ).

After that I had no problem with American Express as I paid off my monthly balance for years, eventually gaining Gold and then Platinum level - however the annual fee jumped,, plus they started extending the limit to pay over time for major purchases, such as travel and appliances. They also offered me a Blue card at a much lower rate, and lower annual fee, with a very healthy credit limit.

At that time I was still working on establishing my home in Texas, and recovering from an expensive two years in California (again I refer you to my book for full details) and sadly was trapped in the typical American credit card spiral.



However, the point of this blog is to explain how I discovered why AmEx has such high interest rates - because they do. I am happy to say I finally did get out from under the credit card debt and we now only use our credit cards for major purchases when we know that we can clear the balance immediately. We have a very low interest card from our Credit Union and decided that was all we needed, and we certainly didn't need to be paying annual fees to AmEx for cards we rarely used. So, last month I called and cancelled both my AmEx cards. They explained to me that as long as there was a balance on the card I would receive paper statements (I have been on electronic statements since they were available). Well, fine - I didn't have a balance on either card so that was that.. I thought.

Then I received two letters from AmEx, one for each card, confirming what they had told me on the phone, next day I received two statements, each showing a credit balance - the annual fee refund for what was left of their financial year. Then the following day I received two more letters pointing out that I had a credit balance and would therefore continue to receive statements despite the cards being closed.


I wrote to them and requested a refund check be issued. I received two letters, one for each card, confirming receipt of one letter and advising me that they would issue refund checks. A couple of weeks later I received two letters containing the checks. Finally, last week I received a statement for one of the cards, showing a zero balance on a card that had been cancelled for over a month. I am waiting for the statement on the other zero balance and I sincerely hope that will be the last communication I ever have from AmEx. I can't begin to imagine how much it cost them to generate all that mail, paper, postage, person hours - all for nothing! Why could they not just issue a check once the cards were cancelled and be done with it? Then maybe they could reduce that high annual fee and the high annual interest rate.

I looked on their web site - they now offer no less than 21 different credit cards, mostly in partnership with other businesses, some with various rewards attached, all with very high interest rates, and most with an annual fee. They even have one prepaid 'credit' card, which has no credit check required! Well, why on earth would you expect a credit check if you have to load the card before you can use it. But what most intrigued me about that prepaid card was the $1 monthly fee!

I might be neurotic, or maybe it is OCD - perhaps both?

I freely admit that I am obsessed with time. Not just being on time. In fact I am almost always early for everything, and if it looks like I might not be early I get very stressed. But I have a real need to know what time it is, all the time.  I have a clock (thanks to my husband) that projects the time on the bedroom ceiling in large red digits, so that when I wake during the night I can instantly know what time it is. We have at least one clock in every room in the house. I feel very uncomfortable if I don't know what the time is, even if I have nothing to do and nowhere to go. So, I do know that I am a little obsessed with time and, after all, that is what the 'O' in OCD stands for (Obsessed not Time).

Then there is the germaphobia I don't believe I have, but I think I almost do (see this blog entry). As I looked back over blog entries I noticed I have alluded to similar topics before, as in this one here. Perhaps I am just a bit obsessed with the possibility of being neurotic?

Today I had to consider that perhaps I am also almost neurotic. What, I hear you ask, made me think that? And naturally I will tell you, as there would be no point in mentioning it here if I was not prepared to expand.

I went to get my nails done today, manicure and pedicure and an eyebrow waxing. The full treatment. No, I don't consider that neurotic behavior, but as Kim (at Millennium Nails in Cedar Park) started on my nails, a married couple came in and asked if they could both have a manicure and pedicure and how long would it take. When they were told it would take about an hour, they said great, because our daughter has a performance in an hour and a half. They sat side by side on the plush pedicure chairs, enjoying the massaging action and reading magazines or accessing email or similar on their phones. The were totally relaxed. I, on the other hand, was quite stressed. An hour and a half 'till their daughter's performance! There wasn't enough time to be sitting there relaxing!

I didn't know where the performance was and didn't care what it was, I just knew they would be late. I kept checking my watch, and the clock on the wall and the progress of their pedicure, mentally trying to figure out if they could possible be ready in time. The wife was done with her pedicure first, smaller feet I suppose, and she moved without any sign of stress to the table for her nails. She didn't even glance at the clock. Finally the husband's feet were done and his manicure began. I consoled myself that he would not be getting his nails painted so it would be faster. But still I kept looking at my watch, then at the clock on the wall, and I so wanted to warn them they would be late, and tell everyone to hurry up! Of course I didn't but I can't begin to tell you how relieved I was when they finally sauntered out of there, exactly an hour after they had arrived.

During that stressful (for me anyway) hour they mentioned that the performance was at the Cedar Park Center - approximately 5 minutes away. But I knew there were at least 4 sets of traffic lights between Millennium Nails and the Center - and traffic was bad on Saturday afternoon, especially as it was raining, and parking was a nightmare at the Center.

My only argument in favor of my claim to sanity is that I was aware that I was being neurotic and I was mildly amused by it. When I got home I searched for tests online - not that I really believe these tests prove anything, but I find them interesting. Let's face it , quizzes are all the rage on social media these days.

I took one test for Neurosis here, and the result was :

My understanding is that the higher the score, the more neurotic you are. I did take the test a second time and it was 70% still too high to be normal.

Then I found a test for OCD here.

I am guessing that was a US test because I got slightly different results (with identical questions) on a UK website here - notice however that the total score was also 12!

Perhaps OCD type behavior is more normal in the UK? I couldn't find a test for the Irish but I am fairly sure if I did, it would prove me to be 100% normal by Irish standards.

Shopping

I absolutely hate shopping. Well, I lie, I hate shops and dealing with sales people. That is why I love shopping online.

Most of all, I hate buying a car. Don't get me wrong, I love cars, I love new cars as is obvious by the number I have owned! But my experience buying them has been varied. Perhaps it is not so much buying the car, as trading in the old one.

I bought three cars in Ireland. all used and in each case I had no trade in. The first I bought from my sister - not an issue. The second was a used Fiat 128 from a dealership, It turned out to be a very reliable car and I drove it to a standstill. It ended it's life as a 'green' house - that is a planter behind our back yard. I grew bell peppers inside and other items out of the trunk of that car and they were amazing. The only other car I bought in Ireland was a used Volvo, who can go wrong with a Volvo? It was a great car. I sold that car to a friend and my only mode of transport for a number of years was a motorbike.

However, when I came to the US and settled in Texas, I discovered that a car was not a luxury, it was absolutely essential if you wanted to work and I did. But I hit that chicken and egg situation. You can't get credit without a credit history, but if you never got credit you don't have a credit history. I was lucky, I had someone who was prepared to go guarantor for me. I picked out a beautiful cherry red Ford Ranger Pickup Truck. I told the salesman that I would be financing it but that I had a guarantor because I had no credit history. He insisted that I should be the second on the loan and my guarantor should be first.  Not only did I not buy his truck, I lost my guarantor who got frightened off by this idea. I do not blame her either.

So I continued to search. I may have mentioned my amazing friend Paul Neumann - I know I have mentioned him in my book Peeling The Onion, well, he introduced me to a Mitsubishi dealership and there I found Debrae. She found me the perfect car, but more important, she bulldozed the finance department in the dealership and secured me the much needed financing - not only did I get my car, I also started building my credit.

I traded that car in, again with Debrae, so I was treated well, and moved up from a program car with 6K miles, to the same model, brand new but had been sitting on the lot for a year, so I got a good deal. It was my first time trading in a car, so I didn't know that I could have negotiated, but I was satisfied with the deal.

Two years later I was ready to move up from a Mitsubishi Mirage to my dream Mustang. Of course I wanted a Cobra, but I was realistic and knew that I would have to delay that dream. I upgraded my Mirage for a Mustang with a very tepid sales experience. Three years later and another Mustang, this time my husband closed the deal. When the time came to trade in for another Mustang, working my way up to the Cobra, the dream dissolved. This purchase was memorable in that it was a nightmare ordeal. Looking back on it I have no idea why I actually bought the car. If it were today, I know I would walk out and go elsewhere. Back then I still had not got a good grasp of how capitalism works, and to this day, I can't haggle - I am not sure why I did this one on my own. I swore that after that my husband would take care of the car purchasing.

I spent what seemed like hours while the salesman ran back and forth between me and some back office, arguing the trade in price. They claimed the car had been repainted due to an accident. I told them not only was it repainted due to a recall on the paint, but their own service department had done the respray job. I did end up buying the car and regret it just because I know I should have walked out. The salesman gave me a bottle of Irish Whisky when the deal closed, but I just felt like hitting him over the head with it. I didn't. But I did learn a valuable lesson. I will never be treated like that again. I will walk out and not go back.

So I will never have my Cobra because I will never go near another Ford Dealership. And now that I have found Joe Ward in the Lexus Dealership in Austin, I no longer care about giving up my dream. I recently purchased my third Lexus from Joe and I have got to tell you it was not just a painless experience, it was fun. There was no pressure, on each occasion I feel we got a very reasonable trade in for the old car and did love my Lexus IS 250s, But this time I got a truly beautiful car, and ES 300 Hybrid! I am so delighted that I finally have a Hybrid - oh and I also got a lovely bottle of Cabernet :) - I like Irish Whisky - but I love red wine! This is going to be the last car I buy, Those words sound sort of familiar - I do believe I said that before, a few times.

Repurposing & renovating

Recently Larry pulled a couple of pairs of jeans out of his closet to be thrown, they were not even worth giving to Goodwill as the seat was worn through. Before he threw them out, I rescued strips of denim from the legs. Ideal for samplers when testing out my embroidery designs.



Currently I am working my way through a pair of sheets, but I needed some fabric of a heavier nature to give me some variation. Denim was perfect for that.

The following week I looked at my potholders and bemoaned the fact that I would have to finally throw them away as they were really getting to look ratty. They had proved to be the perfect pot holders for me, I had tried replacing them but as my hands are not very strong (the result of having suffered from carpal tunnel syndrome before it became fashionable), I need pot holders that are not doubling as resistance training. Larry suggested that I could possibly recover them. !!Light Bulb!! (He comes up with some very clever ideas).

So, using the denim saved from his old jeans, an ideal material to recover the back of the pot holders, the working side is silicon and in great condition still. I played around with a few designs and, because I don't go much for the 'twee' theme, I selected to use cartoon type drawings of a hamburger and a hot dog.





The hardest part of this entire task was stitching the finished backing to the potholders, and I would be the first to admit it isn't perfect by any means - but it works for me and I am now on a quest to make, from scratch, some more of these, perhaps for myself, maybe for gifts.

I am hopeful that making them from scratch will be a lot easier. With that in mind I have ordered some silicon pieces. I will let you know how it goes!

Sleep..

.. or lack thereof.

Many of my friends (and you know who you are) suffer from chronic insomnia. My sleeping patterns over the years have changed, naturally, as we get older everything changes, so why not sleep patterns. When my children were babies and growing up I, like all mothers of young children, slept when I could and generally spent the waking hours like a zombie, it is normal and fortunately short lived. Though at the time I felt no one had it as bad as I did. My first child didn't sleep through the night until he was 3 years old, and when I say he didn't sleep through the night, I mean he woke 10 or 12 times each and every night. During those three years I had two more pregnancies and two more babies who also woke at night at least for the first few months, but at least only for normal feeding routines.

As you can imagine, I have little or no patience for people who complain about lack of sleep, even now, or maybe especially now?

I remember my father talking, without any complaint, but purely statement of fact, about how as he aged he slept less.  He woke regularly at 4 a.m. and spent a few hours reading until the rest of the world awoke. He, like most men, happily indulged in what I call the great American 'Nap', though it is not just Americans who enjoy this pass time as my father was Irish, it is much more normal here, in fact it is almost obligatory, at least for men.. or so they say, at least in Texas.. at least in our house.

My sister, a self professing cat person, can survive happily on cat naps. I will be totally antisocial if I nap during the day. No matter how tired I am, I know better than to take a nap, I will regret it, as will all those around me.

I was always a morning person, I love that quiet time when the rest of the inhabitants of my immediate surrounds are fast asleep. I love to be able to think without interruption, without television. I have a hard time with television.  Why do people need to turn that thing on even when they don't intend to watch it? But that is another blog I think...

As I got older, yes, most probably menopause related, I started waking frequently throughout the night, and waking earlier and earlier in the morning. Of course, being a morning person, after a limited attempt at sleep, I got up and enjoyed the morning. I do also feel that time sleeping is time wasted even though I do know we need sleep to survive, I think it is such a waste of life. However for years I thought it was just an age related thing that I slept about 5 hours per night, waking at least 5 or 6 times during those 5 hours. Yes, I got back to sleep almost immediately, so I didn't see any need to complain. A night where I slept 5 hours without remember if I awoke was a very good night indeed.

So, imagine my surprise when suddenly I started sleeping almost 8 hours a night - with maybe only two or three remembered disturbances!? After ten years of the same sleep pattern what could have changed you ask?  Well, that was not a hard question to answer. I refer you immediately to my previous blog regarding change - I finally listened to the Universe and realized that I was not doing what I was supposed to be doing. I took life by the proverbials and changed it and here I am sleeping, not like a baby.. well, yes, maybe a bit like a baby because I still wake two or three times a night, and still on rare occasions my restless legs will trouble me, but more often it is my restless mind, but I get back to sleep almost instantly, the good thing is that I sleep for at least 7 hours each night.

How did I do it? I embraced change and I found a job where I was challenged and happy.

So, next time I find my sleep patterns unacceptable perhaps I will take action somewhat sooner. And, to my friends with insomnia issues (not related to essential medication and you know who you are) I suggest you look at your lives and make changes accordingly.

Just saying...

I did try to relate my sleep patterns to some form of research, but apparently the sleep foundation didn't consider stress as one of the reasons for sleep pattern distortion. However in the interest of full disclosure here are two links to take a look at.

The Sleep Foundation
and
Help Guide

Change Aversion

I have a number of principles that I try to live by, some I list below:

• Trust the Universe
• You alone are responsible for your own happiness
• If you are not happy with your life - go change it

If you read my book, you will see, I hope, that I have done my best to follow these principles.


However, as we get older change becomes more difficult to embrace.

After thirteen years in the same company, doing pretty much the same job I felt myself becoming more and more dissatisfied. Yes, it was a good feeling to be so familiar with the work, and the company, but while familiarity may not necessarily breed contempt, it does frequently reduce challenge and increase boredom.

Why, I hear you ask, did it take 13 years for that to happen? Well, I have to admit I went through stages of being bored during that time, each time it happened I was able to reinvent my position so that it became more challenging. But eventually that became more difficult, and then when changes I disagreed with, outside my control, occurred within the company I decided it was time to make a move. A previous blog entry deals with making that move.

I have to say I was surprised at how difficult it was to push myself to do it, and I really mean push. The temptation to crawl back into my comfort zone was hard to resist, but that was exactly what gave me the incentive to make the change - if only for change sake, but as I said, my reasons were more than just a need for change. However I do believe firmly in my husband's favorite quote

"Adapt or perish, now as ever, is nature's inexorable imperative."

― H.G. Wells

And so I found myself on a 'plane to Seattle for two weeks training, a few days before my **mutter-mutter**th  birthday. Before I started training I had a serious talk with myself.  I warned myself that I would be overloaded with information, if I was lucky I would be able to understand about 5% of it, and remember about 2%.  I also reminded myself that I had started new jobs before and thought I would never be able to figure it out, but I managed then and I will manage again.

It took a lot to not panic those first two weeks, and possibly even more the following month when I was no longer training, but had returned to Austin and was actually doing. At first I felt like I was driving unfamiliar roads in a thick fog. The fog is letting up some now, but still very much in evidence. And while I am still drinking from a fire hose, the pressure is reducing somewhat.

What was unexpected was my inability to pay attention to any of my normal pass times, my embroidery machine sat idle for weeks, this blog has been totally neglected and my next book has been given only a few fleeting thoughts. However, I think I am back on track again.

Now the important thing to remember is that I still don't know very much and all I can hope for is knowing enough to ask the right questions - and more importantly - direct these questions to the right people.



The great thing right now is, everything is so challenging, even what will eventually become tedious contains a challenge. As has always been the case before, I am so glad I made the change. It was hard, and though I didn't go to the moon - I do believe JFK's quote works - and I do love so many of his quotes:

"We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard."

― John F Kennedy 

And here are a few quotes from Project Life

"Observe constantly that all things take place by change, and accustom thyself to consider that the nature of the Universe loves nothing so much as to change. The Universe is change."

― Marcus Aurelius

"We must be the change we want to see."

― Mahatma Gandhi

"If you do not create change, change will create you."

― Unknown

No Smoking

When I was growing up smoking was not just normal, it was cool and the tobacco companies would have you believe it was glamorous, even sexy! I can't think of anything less sexy than smelling of stale smoke and that awful early morning hacking smokers cough, not to mention the stained teeth and foul breath. But almost everyone smoked. Even while pregnant, and as bad, while nursing. In our defense, we didn't know it was bad for the baby. We didn't even think it was bad for us.

When I was twenty I worked as a secretary in a financial services company. I shared an office with my boss, glass walls so he could keep an eye on the workers in the main office, and a closed door so they couldn't hear his dictation, or telephone conversations, so no air. And he was a chain smoker. The office, everything in it including me, reeked of smoke. I don't remember now, but I am sure that the walls and ceilings were stained.  By the end of the day there were ashtrays on his desk filled with butts and ash, and the ash was scattered over the desk and papers and wherever it happened to fall from his always present cigarette.

People smoked in cinemas, theatres, restaurants, on 'planes and on buses (though I do remember when you could only smoke on the upper deck of the bus, in their own homes and in any  home they happened to visit and of course in bars. No one had come up with the idea of going outside to smoke. The movies and billboards were filled with smoking. Cowboys struck matches on their pant legs to light up - very macho and cool and I never could figure out how they did it.


Even in hospitals! Here is a classic photo of my beautiful mother. This was taken when she went to visit my sister who was in hospital, you will notice my mother is smoking. She used a cigarette holder not to be glamorous, but by that time the suggestion that tobacco was bad for your health was being bandied around and someone came up with the idea of using what was then ( in the '60s) very popular, the cigarette holder, to take a filter, just a small plastic tube filled with silica gel, through which the smoke was drawn, the idea was that the silica gel would absorb the tar and allow the smoke through. It definitely trapped a lot of the tar, because I remember being fascinated by the filters she threw away - they started out filled with white crystals and finished up a deep brown mess.

What is particularly scary about this photo is that my sister was not just in a hospital, she was in a sanatorium - a tuberculosis sanatorium. That is a lung disease... right? But in the '60s it was OK to smoke anywhere, even in a ward full of tuberculosis patients, most of who were a lot worse off than my sister whose illness was caught early.




Back then pregnant women smoked and drank alcohol, that is to say they didn't stop doing what they were doing just because they were pregnant. Today the sight of a pregnant woman with a cigarette in her hand is just unheard of - thankfully!

Now smoking is considered anti social, one of the very few place I have seen where an exception is made for smokers is at Atlanta (and I know in a few other airports) Hartsfield Jackson Airport. There there is a glass enclosed room, with an automatic door so you don't forget to close it, filled with people, mostly standing, puffing away between flights. The room is thick with smoke and when the door opens to let someone in or out, the smell is awful.

Offices have designated smoking areas - outside - and I notice that the distance from the entrance has been increasing over the years. In many areas smoking is not allowed even in bars.







We no longer see the Marlboro Man on billboards (a good thing as it is said that four of them died from smoking related diseases), no more TV or Cinema ads and you won't see your favorite hero lighting up on the screen. I have to admit, Marlboro was my choice and I am sure it was the rugged cowboy that drew me to it. Then I moved on to Lucky Strike, definitely these ads were designed for me.

The awful addiction to tobacco has spawned a whole new business, quit smoking aids. From prescription medication (and that really does work - my husband is a testament to that) gum and lozenges laced with nicotine - swapping one addiction for another, patches and hypnotism. As far as I can see, one of the biggest incentives must surely be the cost of a pack of cigarettes today!

Friends on a plane

.. as opposed to snakes on a plane.

In the years that I have been traveling on my own regularly, starting back in the early 1990s, I have talked to a whole lot of fellow travellers, some very briefly, some intermittently during a long flight, or even a short flight, and just with a very few there was an almost 'already knew you' feeling.

Recently I spent two weeks in Seattle training for my new job, and on the trip home I had the good fortune to sit beside Tina and A.D traveling to Austin from some outreach of Alaska where Tina (an Austin native) was an ER nurse. The mind boggles at the emergencies faced in a way back Alaskan ER compared with a metropolitan one, I just bet it was different.

A.D and Tina and I were seated in the less than salubrious seats, backing onto the toilets, with no possibility of putting our seats anything but in the upright position. When the drinks cart came around A.D had two vodkas and two Bloody Mary mixes, Tina had two coffees and two Baileys, I ordered a red wine and they paid for the entire order, so, naturally the second round was on me. And while it did cost me more than two red wines (as pointed out by my frugal husband) I only paid for a wine and two baileys, but I had the amazing experience of total strangers buying me a drink on a plane. I do love new experiences.

It set me thinking about all the people I have met on flights, mostly just to exchange names, enjoy conversations, or just drinks, but on one notable occasion I met an amazing woman. It really was like we had known each other all our lives, or in previous lives if you believe that stuff, whatever, we were like sisters who had not seen each other in ages, we spent at least half of the flight from Atlanta to Dublin non stop chatting.

Now, back in the early 1990s I guarantee you that would have been an end to it. But thanks to the Internet and social media in particular, by which of course I mean Facebook, we have stayed in touch. I am absolutely sure that if the occasion arises that I am in LA or Valerie is in Austin, we will meet up and pick up where we left off, just as sisters do.

I absolutely love flying - it opens up the world.

Teenagers! Have they mush for brains?

I do remember being a teenager. And one of the things that stands out in my memory is that, yes, I really thought I knew it all, and I really did believe that adults had no understanding of the world and didn't know what they were talking about. On top of that, I thought that anyone over 50 was most likely senile and had pretty much lost touch with reality.




Of course, when I was a teenager we didn't have smart phones, in fact we didn't have mobile phones, we had rotary dial phones which could only move a few feet while in use, being restricted to the length of the cable connecting it to the wall.

We called our radio a 'wireless' and I have no clue why because it was also connected to the mains in order to work. But my research tells me it is because radios used to be in fact, wireless, because they ran from gigantic batteries, due to the fact that not everyone had electricity. The highlight of our week was to listen to Dan Dare, Pilot of the Future, on the 'wireless' when I was a child, we didn't get television until I was into my teens, and then there was not much to watch.

But I am wandering from my point.

We didn't have personal computers, much less tablets. Our entertainment was not at all virtual, books with paper pages, pen or pencil and paper, jigsaw puzzels and board games, where pieces were frequently missing. No video games, YouTube or Facebook.




It was a different world with different holes to fall into if we took a wrong turning. Smoking and drinking underage was what the bad kids did, and into my later teens, that included weeds other than tobacco. I am sure other drugs were readily available. What I am not sure of is why I never indulged in anything more than tobacco (and how I wish I had avoided that too!). Alcohol held no mystery for me as my mother was French and so wine with dinner was perfectly normal, though the kids did get their wine watered down. As there was no mystery involved in drinking there was no reason to consider it wild and free. I was never one to go along with the herd, peer pressure had no effect on me and drugs frightened me, so I avoided them, even to the extent of leaving a party or gathering if I became aware that there were drugs involved.

I am not saying that I was a goodie two shoes, on the contrary, I was a rebel but apparently I had my own personal drummer and didn't need to be in step with the rest of the world.

I guess that teenagers are not nearly as grown up as they look, nor as grown up as they think. So, some of the things they do, frequently illegal and often resulting in considerable suffering and expense to the adults responsible for their actions are incredibly stupid. Rather than being young adults, they really are big children.

Today's teenagers still have smoking, drinking and drugs beckoning them to come ruin their lives and those of their parents. But they also have all the electronic crimes ready to trip them, such as illegally downloading pirated software and music. And those still mushy brains fondly believe they are smarter than the adults who developed those computers, tablets, smart phones and created the software. I suppose if they are also exposed to the criminal adults who indulge in the same infantile behaviour, it can be explained if not forgiven.

And sadly, those mushy brains have still not learned to value trust, and have no clue how hard it is to regain a trust that has been broken.

I wonder how many parents, uncles, aunts and grandparents have displayed extreme self control by not actually shaking their teenagers at least once a month. Perhaps it is all a necessary part of learning and growing.

My wish for the teenagers in my life, and those children who have yet to head through that awkward and frequently dangerous stage, is 'May your mistakes be small, may you learn from them quickly, and may you be smart enough to never repeat them, and may you march to your own drum and not that of someone else'.

Farewell

The last few days in a job after 13 years gave me pause to think.

I have always held that when someone leaves their job to take up another position, there is far too much fuss made of them. When I worked in Dublin the tradition was to have a 'whip around' that is, pass the hat, then buy a gift or a gift card, or even have the company cut a check. Then, on their last day they would have an official presentation of the gift, a card signed by the entire company, or maybe just the entire department if it is a huge company. Then off to the local pub where there was usually an open bar for a couple of hours, subsidised by the company.

Here in Texas, and also in my experience in California, there is less fuss, but still farewell lunches and happy hours are the norm.

Why? why make a fuss about the person who is jumping ship and moving, one would assume, to bigger and better things? Why not make a fuss of those people who remain and continue to work to further the company's bottom line? I never could understand it.

I am used to people, and not just new employees, asking me questions and because I have been here for so long, I frequently have the answers, but if I don't, I will know who does or where to look. I hardly noticed. This week I noticed. Every time someone asked me something and I was able to give them the answer, they said "what will we do when you are gone!". And I noticed how often in a day it happened.

This caused me to stop and notice just how much folklore information I did have stored in my head. Yes, I have been documenting all the projects I have been responsible for. Yes, the code for all the utilities I developed to assist me in my testing and automating of my tests is checked in to source control. But, how do you document answers to questions. I guess if I had thought about it 10 years ago, I could have started a FAQ page. Every time someone asked me a question, however simple, I could have added it to my FAQ page. Perhaps it would have helped, but only if everyone was aware that it existed, and where it could be located. Of course once I left, it would slowly become obsolete as systems changed, but at least I would be leaving that information behind where it could be useful.

And so, when I walk out of the office for the last time, I will carry a wealth of knowledge in my head. Knowledge that, for the most part, will be of no value to me whatsoever, but will be a huge loss to the colleagues I leave behind. Perhaps in my next job I will keep a FAQ page, it will of course start with all of the questions that I will find myself asking in the first few weeks or months. But hopefully, it will eventually be where I store the knowledge that I will accumulate.

Job search

I have 10 days left to complete thirteen years, one month and one day working the same company. If I have learnt anything from the past thirteen years, and more specifically from my search to find another position it is this:


Never take your eyes off the job market.

It is important to know what jobs are available and you never know when an even more perfect opportunity will arise, and if nothing else, you will keep up to date on what skill sets are being required. In this way you can keep honing your own skills to meet the trending marketplace.

Apply for at least three jobs per year, even if you have no plan to change employment. 

If all you get is a phone screen, this is good practice, and hopefully you will get at least one interview. The interview process varies so vastly from company to company, and there is a distinct fashion in interview questions and styles. Thus, if and when you decide to move on, you, and your resume, will require very little extra work.

One of the hidden disadvantages of staying in one company as long as I have is that you get stuck in a rut, you are almost completely blind to the changes going on in the working world outside your currently employment and this will work against you in interviews. Regular interview practice will help to keep you in tune with the world.

Serious about changing your job?

I am a thinker and a writer, an introvert. I have always felt that I am not very good at presenting myself at interviews and, as a result, I have had very many interviews where I came out knowing that I messed up. You know that feeling? 'Why did I say that?! I know what I should have said'. But after the interview is way too late.


Below are a number of things I have picked up, either from my research prior to interviews or from personal experience both as an interviewer and an interviewee.

• Prepare for your interview as you would for an exam.
• The single most important thing is be honest - never lie about your skills or experience
• Turn off your mobile phone
• Arrive early - most definitely do not be late
• Don't be afraid to ask for water if it is not offered, believe me you will need it.
• Dress appropriately - it is OK to ask what the expected dress code is at the time the interview is being scheduled
• Research the company
• Know the specific position you are applying for
• If possible, speak to people who have interviewed at that company
• If you don't know anyone who has, there is a lot of information on the Internet (www.glassdoor.com) on this
• Don't let all of the reports on a company phase you, remember that a lot of these will be from disgruntled people. Ever noticed how only those people who are dissatisfied write reviews?
• In the first few minutes an interviewer's opinion of you is formed on how you look, act and sound, not what you actually say
• Watch your body language
• Listen 
• Relax - remember they are not trying to prove you are wrong for the job, they want you be right 
• Don't talk too much and don't interrupt 
• Prepare answers for the main questions: why do you want the job, what are your strengths and weaknesses, where do you want to be in 5 years
• In particular, be prepared to answer what your weaknesses are with a weakness that is not going to adversely affect the position you are applying for, and follow up with what you are doing to try to correct that - don't labor the point.
• Be prepared with a list of examples of things you have done in previous positions that illustrate your abilities
• Make sure you understand each question and take your time if you need to think
• Be positive about yourself and your experiences
• Prepare some questions to ask at the end of the interview 
• Finally, if you are asked how you would solve a specific problem, at least try. Don't say you don't know, don't try to figure it out silently, try to work through it verbally. Almost always it is not the solution they are looking for, but how you approach the problem and more important, that you are prepared to try to solve it.

Not so much storage as..

..keeping my work space organized.

Every time I get ready to do some embroidery, I start with an idea, find a good image, create the design in my PE Design Plus software, and I get a page with this information on:

What I have to do next is gather these threads ready to use in order.  I started out by just lining them up on the table beside my sewing machine, but that wasn't ideal.

Next I tried using an egg carton, and while that kept things relatively tidy, the spools of thread were bigger than the cups in the carton, and so it didn't satisfy my sense of order.


I had a couple of dowels and tried to balance one in the very large spool of black bobbin thread in my storage basket, as you can see from the photo, that almost worked, but it was balanced very precariously and if I wasn't very careful removing the thread as I needed it, it all toppled over.


So it occurred to me that if I could drill a hole in the side of my work table, just the right size to hold one of the dowels, that would keep it upright and steady. I am perfectly capable of drilling a hole, after all I built an entire deck, OK it was a small one, but I had a very nice collection of power tools and I did build a deck, however, no reason on earth to go to all that trouble now that I have a very handy and willing husband, so at my request, he drilled a neat hole in the side of my table and the dowel fit perfectly.

Problem solved! Now every time I start a new project, I place the threads on my dowel in the order I will need them and I am ready to go. The dowel will hold nine spools and I almost never use more than nine colors so it is just perfect. I am sure I will eventually have to come up with some way to indicate a repeat of the same color, but so far that has not happened so I will worry about it when it does.

The history of a bruise..

actually, lots of bruises. I was going to title this 'what some people do to meet firemen' but I felt that was a bit unkind considering what poor Mildred has been through.

10 days ago she was leaving HEB and stepped off a curb she didn't realize was there, poor thing landed on her face and the unforgiving concrete jammed her glasses into her eye sockets. Fortunately the glasses didn't break - and I say that not because we care about the glasses, but because broken glass would surely have added to her injuries. Even more fortunate, none of her bones broke.

Within seconds she was surrounded by four firefighters from the local Cedar Park station. They just happened to be on their lunch hour and calling into the supermarket. They made sure that she was in one piece and fully compos mentis before they allowed her to leave. They did ask her if she wanted medical attention but she declined.

Considering that she has been on blood thinners for well over 6 months, we were very concerned but she assured us that she was fine. The first day, the only pain she felt was from her nose. The second day she felt her knee (this lady has two artificial knees to complicate matters), and the third day she realized that she must have twisted her ankle as that was also bothering her.

Day 1

Here is a pictorial record. This is one tough lady, day ten after the fall, she claims it is so much better and she is doing fine.

Day 2

Day 3

Day 5

Day 6

Day 10

Day 2

Day 5

Day 6

Day 3

Day 10