E for B

Used to be an advertising slogan when I was a kid.  ' E for B and be your best ', then they roped in George Best, a famous soccer player in the 70s and it became 'E for B and Georgie Best'.

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I like eggs, and frequently have two poached eggs for breakfast, and when I have eggs, I particularly like them with hot salsa on.

At work we have a fully stocked kitchen, but only egg substitute is available and I prefer real eggs, so I bring my own from home.  Even if I wanted to cook them by the old fashioned method in water, I can't because we don't have a stove, but as it is now possible to microwave them successfully, without major issues - usually - that is what I do.  I have a purpose designed microwave egg poacher and it works really well.

Sometimes however, either I forget it at home or it is in need of a wash, so I got in the habit of using a disposable paper bowl, with another upside-down on top, that works equally well - usually. This morning I broke two eggs into a bowl, covered it with a second bowl and mircorwaved it for 30 seconds, checked, another 30 seconds and another check, then a final 30 seconds - perfect!  Added a spoonful of hot, chunky salsa and cut into one of the eggs.  Note to self:  'cut the egg before adding salsa'. The explosion would have been less messy. I guess I should be thankful that I added that extra 30 seconds and the eggs were not soft.

Yes, it exploded and I don't just mean it popped and spat a bit. No. It was a massive explosion, I could actually see the debris flying in all directions. And the smell! oh dear me that was horrible! my desk was complete covered in small globs of egg and salsa.  Worse, it was in my hair, my face, up my sleeves and down the legs of my jeans.

By the time I had wrapped what remained in the bowl in a few layes of tightly sealed plastic bags and transported it to the bin in the kitchen (didn't want that smell lingering in my office all day if I could help it), wiped down my desk and rinsed off the spots and splashes from my clothes, and picked what I could see out of my hair, I was ready for breakfast. Yes, I know darwin award on its way, I tried again.

This time I did have the sense to not add salsa, but surely it wouldn't happen a second time.. right?  wrong!  3 x 30 seconds, pulled the eggs out, they looked lovely, but I stood as far back as I could and gently poked one with the tip of a knife

it exploded too - not quite as spectacularly, but with the same appauling smell.

Another trip to the kitchen with a plastic bag of the remains and I settled for some fruit and nuts for my breakfast.